I LOVE ARCHERY

So! I moved up to the 30# bow, which is the strongest we have, and it is AWESOME. I slapped my arm with the string a few times, but honestly? I don’t get the big deal. I didn’t even notice until I said “oh hey my arm is red, how did that - oh yeah, it slapped a bit” and then it turned into a hilariously ugly bruise. Gotta remember to get that arm out though, don’t want it to mess up my aim. I did pretty well - gotta get used to the extra speed (the arrow goes THUNK now instead of a pleasant thwack, and it’s about six inches into the target instead of two) but yay me! I barely got tired! I need to switch partners though. I think there’s a guy near the end who doesn’t have a partner. I will steal him.

Not freaking out today. I met with my Writing teacher and he said my survey is looking awesome. Tomorrow morning I will write my draft of my literature review and fix my bibliography, and in the afternoon I will finish the survey and double-check it with him, and then I have all weekend to do, gosh, let’s see the list… Get the survey online and working, fix draft of literature review, finish Bio lab worksheet, do Calc problems, write a paper on election fraud for InfLit, work on UNH application, find my voter registration card, and hook up with the group that’s making sure people are ready to vote. Fortunately most of that isn’t due until late in the week. :D The only urgent items are the survey and voting stuff.

LOOK AT ME I’M A BUSY COLLEGE STUDENT
I SPENT TODAY LOOKING UP CAT BREEDS AND TALKING TO ALLY ABOUT NCIS
DURR DURR DURR

I accidentally freaked myself out over nothing. Well, not nothing - my Writing project is a big deal, but I am totally prepared and will do spectacularly. Even if no one takes my survey, that’s a result! I can speculate on that, or even ignore it entirely! It is not a big deal. I’m just anxious because the schedule for the rest of the semester fits on one page. That is still a lot of time! I will do fine at the worst, and awesome at the best. But I kinda freaked out and had a whole anxiety thing, so after dinner I decided to go to the library and do lots of work to calm down, because making progress makes me feel better. And indeed, it reassured me that I am totally prepared, and I found the last few articles I need for the bird flu project, and I found a bunch of things for my InfLit project, and I wrote a draft of the survey, and now I am sleepy and reassured so I will go back to my room, make sure I’ve got everything all set for Bio lab in the morning, and take a sleeping aid so that the last dregs of pointless anxiety don’t ruin my week. Tomorrow I will write my literature review, talk to my Writing teacher about the survey, and go to archery! Yes, I am returning to archery! That alone will make me feel better. I’m pretty thrilled.

So other than that little anxiety incident, things are pretty freaking awesome. This weekend will be pretty busy: I’ll have a couple Calculus problems, a Bio worksheet, my Writing survey, and I think a thing for InfLit, and I’ll also be going around telling people to vote on Tuesday. I’m so excited about voting! Don’t get me wrong, I firmly believe the election is fucked and my vote doesn’t matter, but I am excited anyway. I saw an ad the other day from the Obama campaign that was pro-second amendment! I did not know that before. Also I am very excited because Shan said he got me a pamphlet from the Army about bird flu. I am very very very excited about that. :D But now it is time to calm down and go to sleep.

Man, wait until I freak out about finals.

My mint plant has a bad case of mites. Sigh. I put it in quarantine, clipped off the worst parts, and sprayed down the rest because apparently forceful application of water is the best control for spider mites. It better not have spread to my catnip. Sigh. The mint has been doing so well, too, putting out new shoots and branches like crazy. Well, at least those will get some more light now that I trimmed out some of the chaos in there. I was actually really surprised - I transplanted the catnip and mint from square potting soil (which was the texture of pure styrofoam, it was gross) to my organic potting soil which has zero styrofoam, and when I did this I tried to get rid of as much of the old stuff as possible. So basically I rinsed away all their dirt and then shoved them awkwardly in new stuff. But they loved it! I was half-expecting them both to die of shock, but they were thriving until this whole spider mite debacle. Goddamn spiders that are too small to see with the naked eye. I KNOW YOU’RE THERE. I SEE YOUR WEBS. I SEE YOU KILLING MY LEAVES. DIEEEEE

I am feeling really good about things. Calculus is going poorly, but Bio is excellent (I got a 93 on my lecture midterm!) and everything else is FABULOUS DAHLING. But most importantly, I’m constantly moving a little closer to my dream. I’m researching and getting small-scale experience and I’m gonna apply to UNH and go do Wildlife Ecology and it will be SO AWESOME. I wanna see if I can take their ecogastronomy thing, too. It’s probably geared toward the restaraunt industry, but still awesome.

Anyway I gotta go to class but basically, really busy week. I’ll try to get in touch with everyone this weekend, when I can remember how to breathe again. ♥

I want to turn that picture in the last post into my blog header. No, really. It makes me giggle and also want to scream in frustrated rage and terror. I figure this is an appropriate combination for this blog.

Nooooot much to talk about. I’m sure there are several small items I could stretch into a huge pointless post, but that seems a bit silly. In summation: Fall Break was nice, I miss my cat, I like having friends here, I got a pumpkin, I wear makeup on a regular basis now, midterms are this week, I am still alive. Gonna go a lot of studying today. Need to do up those flashcards and make a cheat sheet for Calc.

Feeling better tonight! Had an awesome dinner with Haley and Stacey, followed by a burst of goodwill and energy. I picked up my room - it didn’t really need it, but it made me feel better, and I started packing too. Need to do laundry tomorrow and pack that. Shower made me feel better too, even though it kept me up a little late. Bed now, yay! Tomorrow I get up at 7. Or 7:30, whatever. XD As long as I am out the door before 8.

I really wish I could stop throwing up at random intervals today. I am miserable and skipping all my classes because man, I know how far that bathroom is from my Writing classroom. Luckily we’re not doing anything significant - just reviewing MLA and APA citation formats. Got some homework I should do, and I can totally do that, just… keeping the trashcan by me. There’s no warning for some reason, so I can’t run down the hall to the bathroom. I’ll take a shower later, try to get some food in me at some point. I’m thinking a little longingly of eggs and chocolate milk, but breakfast is way over so it would just be a bunch of gross glops, salad, and soup. Trying to decide if the soup is potentially worth it.

I put one of Grandma’s quilts on my bed the other day (no I did not barf on it, in fact some interesting contortions happened to avoid that) and it’s amazing how comforting it is to look over and see it there. Just… home. The thing is older than I am, and I’ve seen it my whole life on various beds, and it’s just… so nice to see it on mine, in this place that’s starting to feel like Mars.

Yeah, today is not an especially good day.

P.S. Gonna try installing alpha software without backing up my computer. DARING.

I went to my counseling appointment, which turned out to be intake, and proceeded to amuse the dude with my knowledge of the finer points of confidentiality and vocabulary. Yes, I use words like “inertia” as a matter of course. Mmm. It was a harder conversation than I thought it would be. I’m pretty open about things in general, but I laugh them off. I don’t think I’ve ever talked seriously about some things, and it was a lot harder than I expected to discuss them even in summary. But in about 45 minutes I gave a fairly accurate Cliff Notes version of my life, with a bit more detail on the current stuff, so I think I’ve given them what they need to basically understand where I’m coming from. The focus is on finding ways to get me back on track with classes, anyway. Or at least that’s my focus. I can fix me later, right now I need to be able to work.
Been feeling sick again on top of everything else. I really can’t wait for the weekend. I’ve started feeling like I’m on a different planet or something, just really removed from pretty much everything I’ve ever known. But Haley came over and we did our Bio lab worksheets together, and then we just hung out and kinda ignored each other and we both agreed it was really nice and low-key. We go to meals together a lot, and usually Corey and Stacey are there too. Having friends is nice.

Better go to bed so I can actually get up tomorrow. Tomorrow is Wednesday, so Bio lecture will start me off. Awesome. I can doze and take notes, then eat, then take notes in Calc (which I am totally getting now, awesome), then nap/read/whatever until Writing (unless something is due, it probably is, something is always due in Writing) and then I can do whatever. Like weave. I like weaving.

So, so listless.

I suspect many of my posts will involve the crane in some way, so I should really find out whether he’s a crane or stork or what. *wiki* Aha, he is an egret. Now I can tell my story.

I went down to the stream while talking to my sister on the phone, which was quite nice, and as I walked along I noticed there were an awful lot of branches that dumbass kids decided to rip off the willows. So I picked up a bunch to make a basket, and kept heading down the river, and I ended up finding the egret. I said hey, and sat down on a big root under a willow to start weaving. This was, mind you, about five feet from where he was. He didn’t seem to mind, and in fact barely looked at me, and so I started weaving. It turned out he was hunting mice, and he got two or three, and did a funny thing where he brought them over to the water and dunked them a few times before swallowing. I thought it was kinda cute. So he stuck around until some woman decided to let her kids chase him off. I ended up weaving a neat little basket which will probably fall apart. XD I am not the best basket weaver ever. But I spent a few hours on it and it was very soothing. If Mister Egret ever honors me with a feather, it’ll get woven into the basket. I think the basket will be the new home for my shrine. Yes, I have a little shrine. Not sure what to - peace, I guess? I have a few nutshells squirrels gave me, a stone from under a bullfrog’s belly, tiny acorns, a colorful leaf, and a pair of cicada wings. They’re in a handmade bowl right now, but I think they’ll like the basket better.

Having issues focusing on much of anything or feeling motivated today. I think I’ll go do dinner and then work on my lab worksheet. I hope I don’t get in trouble for the basket - it’s probably against the rules to take branches off the trees, and I don’t exactly have anyone to vouch that I made it from what I found on the ground. It’s a stupid little thing but it’s really stressing me out now. Oh well, what happens will happen. It is a cute basket.